Climbing a mountain is very
difficult and reaching to the top is even harder. Ask anyone who is a
mountaineer. However, what’s harder is
coming down when you have suddenly been pushed and the speed with which you
propel to the ground is so unimaginable and unconceivable that your brain
actually finds it hard to process. I am referring to my experience, which I
like to call 0 to 21 to 0. I have been running for four years now and the time
itself indicates the effort I have put towards building my distances over the
years. Somewhere down the line of 500-600 km later (I actually never kept count
of the distance I have accumulated, because you tend to take it for granted
once it becomes a part of your life), I found myself in a position where
running was a taboo, a forbidden word, the opposite of realistic and seeing
runners on the road made me literally cry. I’ve never really gauged my
barometer of sensitivity but I can assure you it was bad.
I suffered a slip disc, which
initially I was pretty much in denial of and refused to discuss with quite a
few people. I still remember being told at my doctor’s visit and it didn’t sink
in until I was driving back home and I had to stop my car because I burst into
tears. I knew at that moment what I would miss the most was my running. I
didn’t give a damn about the alternatives like cycling or swimming. What stung
me was the hard fact that I would probably not be able to run like before or
just not at all. In the initial stages of recovery I blocked out my passion for
running and focused entirely on strengthening my legs again. From being a
mountain runner, my legs felt like jelly merely climbing up the stairs in my
home. I was physically weak and walking longer than fifteen minutes would bring
back the gruesome pain, forcing me to not sit but lie down.
Whilst I was doing physiotherapy one
day, I met with a man who had been run over by a car and he told me he felt he
was barely lucky to even be able walk and running or any other high impact
sport was written off his chart forever. I didn’t feel wonderful after speaking
to him, but I did feel lucky to know I was not in his shoes, and mine fit far
better!
The magic wand as I call it, was my
chiropractor and good friend Doctor Gregory Veggia. Everyone, literally
everyone in my surroundings had chalked off the possibilities of running again.
To be honest what I heard a lot was “oh you poor thing, I guess that’s a
goodbye to the running huh?” The tone all these people used felt so
condescending and belittling. I am certain they only meant the best for me, but
I could not feel the sympathy.
Coming back to Gregory, well he is a
very realistic and no nonsense fellow. What struck me the most about his
methodology was the patience with which he handled my vertebrae, his theory was
always to take a positive step to recovery every week and initially what was a
short walk turned into an hours walk and then I was told to return to the gym
and try some light cycling. There was always a goal in mind. As a sports person
I was able to relate to this approach. I had a timeline and I had an ultimate
goal. He was and is specific with his treatment and asks all his patients to
follow certain rules. I did indeed follow these and continue to do so. He was
the only person who casually said to me “well we can have you running hopefully
in the summer”. I think I almost felt the need to record his words and play
them back to myself as motivation. It overwhelmed me to know this was possible.
The climb back up has been full of
jagged moments. I initially started off cycling and felt good doing something
different to my usual cardio activity. Nevertheless, my legs still lacked the power
I was used to. I was attending the gym regularly but I continued to ache and
generally felt lethargic. I knew there was something I was not doing right.
This point in my climb was negative
and I went through days of being scared of the gym. My mind wanted to be there
but my body was holding me back. I played hide and seek with myself and was in
denial of the fact that I was still in pain. In this time of negativity, I
bumped into an ex trainer of mine (Alberto Ramos) at the gym and he had been my
pillar when I was training for my mountain run last year. We spoke about my
problem briefly but I never made him see how low I really felt. He was actually
leaving his job at the gym so we were saying goodbye. His parting words to me
were “Don’t let go of your running ok?” His tone carried conviction and I
really felt like he knew I was almost giving up. His words, as brief as they
were, still resonate in my head every so often.
Gregory had warned me there would be
good periods and then dark periods. Perhaps I was on the dark side and had to
extract myself out of this phase. I took a small holiday and during my holiday
I noticed my upper back felt like a block at the end of every day. We were out
and about a lot and although I wore flat trainers everywhere and had given my
heels their own vacation, I still ached like an old lady. The pain from my hips
had disappeared but now I had welcomed a new phenomenon of agony. Frustration
accompanied me but also led me to the solution. Pain kills pain. I was in
bitter pain and I was in search of my sweet
pain.
Suddenly I was made aware of what I
needed to do. I had been focusing all this time on strengthening my legs.
However what holds your legs up is your back. Not once had I thought about
giving fuel to my back. Gregory was adjusting the vertebrae but it was my duty
to fine tune these vertebrae and strengthen the muscles. I returned home and
immediately started exercising the following week, concentrating this time on
stretching the upper and lower back with the correct exercises. I am now in the
care of a personal trainer again and she is specific to my needs, watching my
progress every week.
Running was a fortuitous accident
the first time and the return was again serendipitous. I was on the cycle two
weeks ago, warming up a bit. I was listening to a track on my iPod and it
brought back memories from a run I had done back in 2011. I felt compelled to get
on the treadmill and simply try to jog for a few minutes. I felt like I was
being sneaky and searching for a candy bar, but I am a big believer of
following the right vibe and this vibe was to go and run. My first leg lifts
almost felt like a baby taking his first steps. I recalled the few times in the
recent past when I had attempted to cross the road with a small trot and failed
miserably. I blocked out those images and focused on my music. 2.4 km later I
was the happiest I had been in over two months. He was taking care of me and I
knew this because I had no pain. A painless jog was a miracle.
Ever since I have broken down the
walls every few days, increasing my distance but always maintaining a steady
pace. I went through a run recently where after 3.3 km, my pain made a stubborn
appearance. I froze and stopped immediately. There was an explanation for this
and I determined the reasons for the pain. Once you are able to find an
explanation for any problem, it automatically solves the problem by more than
50%. I applied the logic and the following day wore my faithful trainers,
insoles, slept well the night before and stretched well before my run.
The following day was today. I had
started my first run at 2.4 km and progressed through in two weeks to 5.75 km.
This morning I felt ambitious to fight my war and win it. The victory entailed
10 km. It was a farfetched goal but my mind told me it was possible. I had
physique on my side so really it was all about applying the technique and
keeping it steady. 73 minutes later I clocked in at 10 km and the rush I felt
cannot be explained. My legs were sore and jelly like, but this soreness was sweet and not gruesome. I hurt and will
hurt tomorrow too, but I craved this agony for months and today I was able to
achieve it. I didn't feel like a winner today, I felt someone greater.
Does a slip disc change your life?
Believe me it does! Nevertheless, my philosophy in life has always been to
mould yourself to the circumstances and keep doing what you do. Quite often the
route will change, but the destination must always be the same.
I love wearing heels and can now
wear them again. I love my food and can now eat a sneaky chocolate bar and not
feel bad about it because my fitness regime is back. I love my mountains and I
aim to go there next week and show off my best moves. I love to dance and have
gone back to doing this with my favourite partner, my daughter.
I do realise I will probably not be
able to cover the larger distances so easily and nor should I aim to make
running my only sport. Balance is best and I know incorporating more of the cycling
and swimming will benefit my condition. I am looking forward to these new
adventures but I will remain faithful to my first love and run when my legs and
back tell me it’s good to go! 0 to 21 http://goldieuttamchandani.blogspot.com.es/2012_02_01_archive.html#.UemuABZptD0
was a very tough journey I have to admit. However, this one here has been the
toughest one yet and perhaps that’s what He had planned for me. What won’t kill you will only make you
stronger.
I call out to all those individuals
who have suffered an injury of any kind, big or small; if you can try to avoid
surgery then please do. If your physiotherapy is not allowing you to fully
recover then embrace other more holistic methods of treatment. In my case it
was a chiropractor and I thank Gregory everyday. I also thank those angels who
simply say the right words at the right time and bring you up from the dark
side.
I
have come back from 0 to 10 and believe me I’m still counting. I wear my experience like a crown and the best way to remain steady in any run is to see that crown on yourself and remind yourself that you were down and now you are up. Coming back up after being at the top is rough, but the merits the second time round are far sweeter.
1 comment:
Inspirational !! Keep it going - both - the writing and the running !!
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