Just Go

You have to go
Just go
So I can let go

I’ve hugged you hard
Despite your guard
I’ve parked my sorrows
But wiped your tears
I’ve fallen right down to the ground
Yet offered to always hold your hand

For you I always did stand

You kept me near
But stayed far and clear
You brought me confusion
I held onto our illusion
You let me down
But your faith was my crown

Now it’s too late
Years of hard work washed by lies
See the quirk of fate
I miss you, sure I do
But you miss me more
I just can’t be there for you
Anymore

Can’t we meet half way?
No damn it
We can’t
You couldn’t even go a step with me
Now I choose to walk away

I will leave you
I have no choice
I will forget you
Because I have to
I will forgive you
To start brand new

You have to go
Just go
So I can let go

Brilliant Minds

A lot of you are familiar with my frequent status updates on Facebook, where I put up snippets from conversations held between my son and daughter, aged 7 and 4 respectively. I know that most of you find these conversations entertaining, humorous and some even tell me how smart or witty these kids are. I thank you all for the feedback and as much as I do find them amusing myself, there is an element of analysis involved in a lot these conversations.

A child has a mind where he is curious and finds a mysterious side to the most mundane things. What we must ensure is to never kill this thirst for the mysterious. We must encourage their minds to explore the world as if it has infinite discoveries and not educate them in a 2D world, rather allow them to enter the 3rd or even 4th dimension. “The world is your oyster” – a phrase we have all heard and used, but very few actually put to use.

Children have this ability to ask you for answers to questions which quite often just don’t have an answer because “it is what it is” and we are left stumped. I will give you an example of my own son. “Does a rainbow come out after the rain because the sun is happy so it is smiling to the world?” A question and an answer in the same sentence!  I can assure you most parents reading this are full of examples, and I urge you to write these down next time. I really do feel in such questions lie the vivid imagination of all children. We must not suppress such questions, it’s important to participate in their fantasies. I actually encourage my son to write stories about his dreams and try to understand why he feels the way he does. 

Is there always a correct answer?

Under the Spanish education system in which our children are being schooled today, there is little concern for what the child is really asking. The fundamental priority is given to inculcating values, rules, a common base where there are fixed answers to the basic questions they ask. I don’t disagree with this approach of course, but perhaps an added bracket needs to be created in the curriculum. This was recently addressed in the 3rd Congress for Brilliant Minds in Madrid. (III Congreso de mentes brillantes). The president of the education institution SEK and Vice President of the Universidad Camilo José Cela – Nieves Segovia concluded that under the current system only the student fails because we only evaluate the student and not the teacher or the system. She called the Spanish system a failed model. 

Segovia clearly emphasised the road to take is one where the student must be given preparation for the uncertain possibilities and not just the certain ones. It’s important to consider the world as a web of connections and the education system must focus not just on a critical thoughts process of the child, but also allow room for a process which involves higher capacities that may otherwise be suppressed; to be interactive, creative and free from boundaries.  

Einstein used to say "The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society which honours the servant and has forgotten the gift” This is the gift children have and it is our duty to see the world through their eyes and help them to discover complexities through simplicities. As teachers it is more important to ask their students what they think, rather than tell them what to think.

How are video games and television stunting our children’s 3rd dimension?

I will give you a clear viewpoint on this matter, which will sum up in simple terms my opinion on the subject. "Where possible, it’s important that the games we pick, should not be battery operated or have buttons for that matter. The batteries must be born within the child. It is not the games which must work, it’s the child that has to be activated thanks to the game he plays” Catherine L’Ecuyer 

When you over stimulate a child externally through television or video games, this starts to overshadow the child’s capacity to wonder and suffocates the creativity and self - motivation of the child. In addition it also saturates the child’s basic senses and impedes the child from perceiving the less noisy stimuli. Ultimately, these over stimulated children actually bore easily as they are constantly seeking new stimulus and are addicted to the noise that these new technologies are artificially providing them with. An example would be the perception of a child in seeing an animal on TV and how they see these animals on a real farm. The smell, the feeling and even the visual stimulus is completely jaded for a child who has only ever seen animals through a screen.

Do you think it’s fair that the panda your child identifies with belongs to an animated 3D film and not the panda he can see and probably touch at his local zoo? 

A real life example of a creative genius

I live in Barcelona, so for me our local creative genius has always been Antonio Gaudi.  As a child Gaudi kept very ill health due to his rheumatism, and this disabled him from playing like a normal child. His mother spent long hours with him, taking him for walks in the woods and provided him with endless hours of direct contact with nature. 

As an adult Gaudi recalls nature to be his first window towards wanting to discover the mysteries of life and nature was in fact his inspiration for his masterpiece, the Sagrada Familia. He was able to translate the beauty of the divine and bring it to the streets and ultimately elevate through the skies this wonderful cathedral we all admire and are in complete awe of. Gaudi did not go to day care at the age of 4 months, he did not have toys that spoke to him, nor did he watch Baby Einstein. His guide as a child was his mother and his best friend was the silence in the nature he was subjected to.

The importance of home education

Gaudi spent long hours with his mother, who dedicated her time on him simply teaching him moral values and although these values have little to do with an academic education, the link comes in when a child with high moral values will certainly question the academics far more than a child who has not been allowed to express his needs and wants. If you take this from a business point of view, well we must consider the child as the client and address his needs first, in order to provide him with the correct solution / education, thus enabling him to flourish as an adult. Spiritual education is vital as this also helps the child in deciding whether his creative ideas are tangible and acceptable in a morally sound society. As a parent we must understand that 80% of a child’s moral education is received at home, which means it is imperative we dedicate this time towards them. 

In conclusion I’d like to stress that we all must keep the creative child in ourselves alive because it is far more difficult to generate ideas and then develop conclusions from them, rather than have your ideas set and then look for arguments to defend these ideas. The most successful companies in the world spend millions of dollars on research and development teams, which allows them to think ahead of the market trends and the results are your Apple, Google and Samsung. Need I say more?  

Our children are the best thinkers and have an innate ability to be rational without bias. Let’s allow them to invent and discover to then teach them with discipline. If you have a brilliant mind living at home, let him shine.  

Myday

Some days are not meant for sharing
Monday, Tuesday and then Myday
Tick tock I spend my time alone
Silence cures me
Therapeutic for my bones

Coffee shop corner
Sip the caffeine
Absorb the feeling
The feeling of knowing
I’m thinking, filtering, analysing
Shush! I'm just being

Alone but not lonely
Conversing with myself
Debating with my mind
Patiently quiet I detach
Noise around
Block it out

Turn off the lights
Dark and soothing
Meditation can be so sexy
So alluring

I run alone in the mountains
Trees and leaves
Keep me company
Along with the cool breeze
I feel they talk to me
Sometimes they tease

I like to be in my cloister
Wrapped up cosy in my paraffin wax
I reflect on the cracks
Cracks only I can heal
Only I can feel

Some days are just not meant for sharing
I want to indulge in exile
Please let me be for a while
I’ll surface when I want to
You should try it
If you want to

A Beautiful Mind & A Beautiful Body

I don't want to make this post about what are the best methods to keep fit or to lose weight. I don't feel I am anyone to help a person deal with such issues. However if there is one area in which I am by far the expert, that is giving my own experience which for me has changed my body completely. 

I had noticed in the last 3 years that I had become a slave of the weighing scale and there was always the magic number which I prayed I would find in the mornings. I struggled very hard to reach that number, deep down I knew I would never get there and if I fit into my clothes and looked somewhat presentable then I should be happy with that.  The reason for my struggle was probably related to my childhood chubbiness which had haunted me for a very long time. The year I got married, I do remember feeling like a million dollars, probably because I had found someone who accepted me for the way I looked and loved my face, my curves and the whole package deal. Looking back at my pictures today, I cringe because I really did not look my best in the physical sense. However, I smile because I was glowing and it was a magical time.

So, recently I reflected on my mood. I had not reached my target weight, I felt scared to eat anything which remotely carried more calories than my daily allowance, I was exercising everyday and I was only just fitting into the clothes which I had aspired to fit into. I realised I was making far more sacrifice than reaping benefits from it. The situation didn't seem right! In all this I never uttered a word to anyone and simply sulked to myself. I was obsessed with wanting to fit into this one particular dress which I was supposed to wear for a special occasion in a few weeks time. I had a goal but I was miserable.

Certain events occurred in my life around the same time and they took away the time which I was otherwise investing in my body and a weight loss plan. I had no choice but to ignore my calories, forget the gym and simply focus on these other priorities. 

After about ten days of no dieting and simply eating like a normal person, without performing any exercise, other than my usual running around and mundane chores I noticed one morning that a pair of jeans were loose on me. I didn't believe it at first so I tried on another pair which was usually tight. This pair fit like a glove and I was so excited that I had to show my husband. My immediate thought was to get on the weighing scale. For the first time ever in my life I saw the magic number and I almost fell off the scales. I didn't understand how this had happened. 

The reason this had happened was because I had actually listened to my body. I was being pleaded and begged for years to stop abusing it and start pampering it. As much as this sounds like a contradiction, sometimes you must feed yourself to shed the weight. I admit I had not eaten unhealthily in these past ten days, but the difference was I HAD eaten. Contrary to the past, I had fed myself the same food I feed my family and not worried about an extra chapatti or an added spoon of rice. I was eating and enjoying my food. I was not over eating because I was not obsessed with my food. My meals were a time to relax and not fret over calories. I honestly believe I was allowing my digestive system to work in a relaxed fashion and it didn't feel my pressure or anxiety which had otherwise stressed it in the past. 

This was indeed an awakening and I seriously felt like a million dollars again, but not because I looked good but because I felt good. Coming back to my wedding day, it was far far more important to be emotionally in tune with myself than to be physically in tune. I told my husband about my little secret and he said he had observed a calmer member at the dining table, hoping she was going to stay and not bounce back to her old ways.

It has now been over a month since I made this discovery. The weighing scale reads the same magic number, I fit into all my clothes, I have resumed the gym but I am not obsessed with it. At present I am actually on a fitness break and it doesn't even bother me. I am eating EVERYTHING and I have people who can vouch for that. What I have worked on is to find an equilibrium and a sense of internal tuning. I listen to my body and it responds back. I am nice to it, so it rewards me by being nice back. The rewards can include simple things like sleeping well, not feeling bloated, not feeling starved and more than anything I feel beautiful. 

In life we can spend years doing a yo yo diet, being on a liquid diet, starving, over eating and simply obsessing over a number or a measurement. I will not deny that I don't care about my size, of course I care, but the minute you start caring about your body and not just the naked anatomy, well this is when you can expect a change. We all know what foods are good for us and we even know which fitness plan can benefit us. Nevertheless, we often hammer ourselves with goals and objectives. When you struggle is when your body is crying to you and telling you to stop! Just pay attention and I can guarantee you will be happier, healthier and HOT!!